Oh my.

I’m just finishing up a few pieces of erotica.

They are filthy, kinky gender fucking madness.

They are not romantic.

They are not sensual (fuck I hate that word).

They are not stories I would be okay with having arty airbrushed White people on the covers of.

They aren’t really “ethnic” enough for arty airbrushed brown people.

Two of them are pants scorchers. They are similar but one is marginally hetero flavored the other one lesbian.

There is a lot of crying, spanking and big dicking lady Leather Daddies.

From the time of my first erotic publication about what now 15 years ago or so? The market has been heavily romanticized and homogenized.

Frankly the erotica that is to my taste (I’ll give links and suggestions later) is rare.

As I’ve said before, the covers bother me. I’d rather have a plain cover though I know that’s a bad marketing move.

But, I can’t bring myself to submit to some of the few places I might sneak in because I don’t see me being marketed to.

I was just checking out one press and every category except the ‘ethnic” one was oceans of White people who are all very conventionally attractive in a stock photo kind of way, unchallenging and for me as a reader not really a turn on.

I’m in that bitter place where I feel edged out because what I think is romantic and makes me tingly in the crotchal region isn’t what brings in the big bucks.

Or maybe this is one of those angsting author things.

I don’t know.

What I mostly feel as I do my market research is this:

  • Uncomfortable (pick a reason. I’m not heterosexual, I’m not White, I’m not into that being all there is)
  • Transgressive in my queer up all the things attitudes towards how I write sexuality.
  • Unmarketable.
  • Disquiet. Where (as I believe Remittance Girl has asked) is the edge? Where is the fuck you (no that’s not how she put it) in all these nice romantic with some spanking things?

All that said, I don’t care if that’s what you like or what you write.

Shit go on with your bad self. Write it like a mother fucker and make that money if you can. That’s awesome.

What’s not awesome is that every time I go to maybe submit some smut someplace, feeling all those feelings that are not good.

When romance started filtering into the industry and there were fewer edgy (I also hate using that word in this context) markets I stopped writing a lot of erotica.

We know I don’t generally write for profit.

But I don’t want to let them molder.

I’m tempted to self publish them.

However I am not the best at that.

Self promotion isn’t my strong suit.

So I’m going to collect them up and maybe shop it to some of the more adventurous presses.

I don’t know.

I suppose the part that always gets me is the fact that there’s room for all of the things.

From boot licking in an alley nasty to the sweet sweet romantic.

It doesn’t have to be this way.

So okay what do I like? Let me show you some of my favorites. These are classics in my head:

Rough Stuff: Tales of Gay Men, Sex, and Power edited by Simon Shepphard and M. Christian.  Uh fuck this book is so hot. SO hot. Raunchy, filthy, nasty and everything I love.

If you like erotica and don’t know M. Christian’s work come on son. My favorite way to be a M. Christian pusher is his collection Dirty Words. Just get it.

Best Bisexual erotica. Get all of them.

So yes those are pretty queer but if you look at even the descriptions you’ll probably get what I’m talking about.

I’m tired and emotional. I should get my contacts out and calm down. It will be fine. I will figure it out.

In the meantime go buy a dirty book you won’t be sorry.

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