Yeah write #254- You. Innocent.

 

You. Innocent.

by

Shannon Barber

You are Innocent.

You are sane.

You are good.

You move through the world without The World tugging at your consciousness. You sometimes walk through shadows so thick your skin wants to retract, fear tickles your sacrum and pulls a nervous laugh from your throat. You walk faster. Shrug it off. Tell your nervous system, your reptile brain that all is well.

You know, to fear violence and evil men. You know to stay away from this block after midnight and that one all together. Your Innocence tells you that the world is the world and anything else is ridiculous.

And yet your Innocence knows too The World. Sometimes you see the people who seem to appear from behind the shadows of street lamps. You see their bloody faces, their eyes full of war. Or you see the others, dirty and muttering, staring at nothing. You hate yourself for your moment of thinking, they are just crazy. Poor drunk bastards. But then, sometimes you meet their eyes and what you see is bright burning sanity and pure terror.

You walk away.

You remind yourself that you are good. You go home and know you are an Innocent. Even in empty rooms where the touch of eyes runs across your skin with hot greed, you know. No,you don’t know you feel. You murmur to soothe yourself, “I’m fine. Silly me.”

You laugh and tell your friends about your midday megrims.

You are not haunted. You are not mad. You know when you see strange flickers in the vaguest shape of a door that you’re just tired. Your glasses are dirty. You are Innocent.

You believe your world is just your world.

At night as you sleep, you know the whisper is just a dream.

“Dream deep Innocent. The World is not for you. We will wait. Don’t get lost. Don’t wander.”

You know the caress on your cheek is nothing. Your world is only the world.

You are good.

You are sane.

You are an Innocent.

###

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