An Arty Farty Bucketlist of Things.

I have a lot of arty things that are on my bucketlist. I want to share.

  1. My longest non-writing, art lust is to make some kind of visual art. My old digital camera broke so I haven’t been taking a lot of photos. And realized the other day how much I miss it. I also strangely miss doing collages. I also still have this self portrait project in my head.
  2. I want to write a proper film script. It is on my list of things I want to study next.
  3. I daydream about doing some kind of performance art.
  4. I want to make tiny artful experimental films.

I’ve been thinking a lot about these things lately and I realize that often I just don’t really know where or how to start. Or if I go deeper I feel like I don’t have a right to want to do these things because I don’t know how to do them.

What I find curious about my emotional backing away from these other artistic endeavors is that once upon a time I felt the same way about a lot of the writing I do now.

Before I started non fiction, I told myself and felt that I was just a blogger. I blogged about being fat and sex and fashion and make up and I read a TON of personal essays. I wanted desperately to write them, but did not believe I had any right to do so. Who the fuck am I?

And remix that about me writing and/or publishing poetry. Or learning to write some stuff relating to literature.

And how it relates to me writing SCLAB.

Now that I’m in an emotional place to look at these feelings I realize what they are. I internalized a lot of bullshit. I internalized a lot of what I learned in school about who and what marginalized people can be.

On one hand, I’m really glad I’ve made that connection in terms of my own creative freedom on a personal level. On the other hand, I’m so angry that I’ve had to take so much time and energy to work it out.

So now, I’m at the part where I’m figuring it out a thing at a time. I’m making a little visual art. Not photographs right now, but I’ll get a new camera eventually.

And I keep telling myself, god damn it you DO HAVE THE FUCKING RIGHT TO MAKE ANY KIND OF ART YOU WANNA.

I can keep yelling at myself about it, and I can start doing some of these things I’m interested in. But it’s just so goddamn hard to unlearn shit.

I still feel this way about how I do genre fiction. I still feel this way about my poetry to a degree.

Consider this another entry in my Be That Shit file.

I can do this shit. You can do this shit.

We’re awesome we can do whatever the fuck we wanna do.

Okay that’s all for now.

Against Diversity.

Given the further ramping up of racism in the lit world, I have to confess something.

In recent weeks I’ve watched digital yellowface, more White lady authors defending each other from us savage Brown, Black, Queer, Disabled and countless others, I have seen White people do intellectual 10.0 tumbling routines in order to make sure everyone knows that it’s never their fault, they aren’t racists, they are just trying to get what we others have.

I have witnessed male poets sexually harass, objectify and gaslight women.

I haven’t commented on every single thing because I was busy putting out a book.

Here is something I’ve come to understand.

When they say they aren’t against, diversity they just are against censorship and racial nepotism they want us others around but quiet.

Yes, it’s reassuring to know that we Wise Old Negresses exists, but naturally only a precious few of us should be visible or audible at any one time.

If more than one of us speaks at one time, it’s just PCness taking over and tantamount to murderous terrorism and censorship on the level of book burnings and religious extremism.

Right.

I see exactly what’s happening.

Solidarity amongst us others is threatening to Whiteness because we have our own voices, and will not only have our own spaces but will be heard in those spaces as well.

I see the patterns in this behavior.

The fear based posturing. The apparently righteous cause of freedom of speech. The White Flight. The victim pose, oh poor picked on White people being held accountable for their words and actions. All of it.

And it is exhausting.

I endure the micro aggressions. I quietly unfollow, unfriend, put literary magazines on my verboten list. I note who I will and won’t EVER work with at my own peril.

And yet, YET I am still right here.

I wrote an amazing book that is vital and important and yes, it is fucking expensive. 

I’ve stood up for my work because god damn it, this is years of my life, deep life changing work for both my publisher and I. And yes, it is that valuable.

I do this work in the face of the wall of White tears, White outrage, Silencing, Othering, and cowpie dodging that is the publishing industry.

I do this work because it is what I am meant to do.

I don’t do it in order to lead White folks and publishers by the hand into the land of milk, honey & diversity.

I do it because I have things to say. Because my voice, the voice that I have struggled to find and learn how to wield like a machete and like a lover’s hand is important.

So yes, YES, by all means keep tumbling and cartwheeling to justify why I should remain silent.

I will not name you all.

But I see you.

I see you.

 

 

My Book is about to be born.

Do you hear that noise?

The rumbling in the distance is the sound of my guts churning because my book is almost born.

Now you may be wondering, “but Shannon I’m a fucking adult what more do I need to know?”

Well, in Self Care Like A Boss we talk about a lot of stuff. For instance, we talk about disability and thinking about it when we’re able bodied. I give some able bodied to able bodied folks some advice. As in, if someone doesn’t ask you, don’t mess with their wheelchairs or other things.

We talk about what to do when you’re sick and nobody is there to take care of you, dealing with gender and pronouns, pooping, beauty for everyone of whatever gender.

This is not just adulting, we’re talking about thriving and basic survival in a society where a lot of us get the not so subtle message that it doesn’t matter how we live.

We talk about bodies and moving.

SO darlings.

My homies.

Now here is where I’m looking for your help.

If you are willing, here’s how you can help:

  1. Help me get the word out. Tweet, fb, share on various social media the link to my book.
  2. Have a blog? Feel free to snag the image and/or link to put up.
  3. Have a book coming out too? Drop me a link and I’ll post it up.
  4. Have questions? Ask away in the comments.

Now here is the cover:

SELFCARECOVER

Here is the link.

Link to my newsletter.

 

 

Y’all are not ready.

I have been sitting on a major secret.

I am super proud to announce that Milcah Orbacedo is opening a brand new press called MotherBlazing Books and I am her first author.

We are going to do SO MUCH together.

There will be special edition print books, ebooks, a brand new website AND TEE SHIRTS.

I am so so happy to be doing it this way. Coming up I’m also going to talk about how meaningful it is to me to be bringing my first not published by me print book into the world with someone who really sees who I am and values me for who I am and who I trust and love.

This is the publishing I want.

Now I am super exhausted and I have been bursting to tell everyone.

To keep up on what’s going on and to see when the new website drops like the bass you can come like my author page on faceook.

I hope you all come along for the ride because it’s going to be fucking great.

 

My new book is here!!

selfcare

 

I overshot my initial publication date but it is done and massive.

Here is my promo blurb:

Brand new and bigger and badder. This is your guide to how to start self caring.This is self care for the rest of us. If you need help, if you need a voice of reason here I am my friend. This is more than 30,000 words of advice about everything from what to do when you’re constipated, to how to manage taking care of your body when your self esteem isn’t so great. Also advice for people with gender feels, some advice about skin care, self health checks and much more.

This is for you, this is for all of us. Regardless of your gender, your body size or shape, if you are able bodied or disabled, if you are chronically ill, if you’re gay or asexual it is for you. Come on homies. Let’s go for a ride.

As a bonus, if you missed the original version of the book, I have included a download link at the end where you can get V1.0. That is TWO BOOKS full of ALL THE THINGS.

And as a special thank you to everyone here, after purchase you will get a coupon that is good through the end of June for 10% off when you spend two dollars.

Click the photo or click here to get your Self Care on.

And if you can’t afford to buy that is TOTALLY OKAY. Signal boost this post, pin it to pinterest, share it on facebook.

Holy shit.

I am so glad I finished it and I love it.

I hope you love it.